Harley-Davidson added two new models to their lineup this week. Normally this is only cause for my phone and email inbox to fill up with jokes. However, and much to my surprise, this could not be less the case with the new Harley-Davidson Low Rider S and Pro Street Breakout. These things are fucking rad.

I know what you’re thinking. Wait, what? Did Sean just say something nice about a Harley? I saw in the comments yesterday that he was sick, but come on. Patrick wouldn’t let him publish while Dayquil Drunk would he?

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Sadly, he probably would, but I’m actually relatively sober today. And I do think these bikes look fantastic, like they’ve received just the kinds of updates I’d like to see.

The Harley-Davidson Low Rider S

I recently reviewed the HD Low Rider as part of my attempt to understand the whole cruiser thing. And, after a few weeks on the thing, I actually started to get it. I still hated the ergonomics on it, and the rear shocks sucked worse than Carson Palmer against the Panthers last week, but loved the motor and enjoyed cruising around on it.

The Low Rider S joins the Fat Boy S and Slim S in HD’s S line and get a host of upgrades including new intake and exhaust systems, twin nitrogen gas charged shocks, a cartridge fork, a new bar sitting atop a 5.5 inch riser, and a SOA inspired bullet fairing. Harley claims power bumps up to 115 pound-feet of torque from 103, and promises any girl I throw on the back won’t wince with pain over bumps now.

I’m not normally a fan of bullet fairings, but I think the HD one is small enough that it actually isn’t too obnoxious. I absolutely love the color scheme of the bike, it almost perfectly mirrors the Suzuki DR-Z400SM Supermoto I built (writeup coming.) This bike didn’t need mooooar power, but I’ll happily take it, especially with better suspension bits.

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The Low Rider S comes in at $16,699 over the standard Low Rider’s $14,399.

The Harley-Davidson CVO Pro Street Breakout

Harley claims it’s evolving as a company, at least style-wise, and the CVO Breakout was the perfect bike to try out some of their new tricks on. It’s no longer about all bright chrome all the time, and they used some of their anodized and brushed finishes on the Pro Street Breakout which, for those of you who speak fluent Harley, comes in Smoke Satin Chrome.

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While it seems incredibly silly that the Motor Co. is so proud of learning to use something besides chrome, I can’t say I’m in any way mad at how the different finishes of the headers and exhaust cans look, or the subtle hue of the wheels.

The Pro Street also gets fancy exhaust, a Screamin’ Eagle intake, a slipper clutch, a new 43 mm inverted fork, dual disc front brake, and ABS standard. Aesthetically, it gets lots and lots of black, drag bars, and LED headlight, bullet fairing, and a new seat for both rider and pillion. It’s also available with some white on it, and will set you back $25,699 versus the regular Breakout’s $18,799.

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Overall, both of these bikes are great updates and to their standard version, though the price bump on the CVO Pro Street Breakout just seems downright excessive. However, if I were in the market for a hog, that Low Rider S would be at the top of my list.

I can’t believe I’m saying this, but Milwaukee just built a bike I want in my garage.